Hello 2013

Its 2013!... Yey...
at its a great time for a fresh start...
2012 had been a good yr. for me...
and im not planning to write it down...
mas feel ko kasing iniisip isip ko nalang...
its a treasure on my mind na masarap balik balikan...

anyway...
i already move back to my family...
family nga ba? hehe..
im now leaving alone... w/ my lola..
na hindi din naman madalas nandun..
bcoz shes busy w/ many stuffs like church etc..
so i feel alone padin pag nasa bahay na ko...
kaya most of the time after work...
i rather catch up some tv shows and matulog nalang...
its a new daily routine padin...
na still changing...
kasi bumibisibisita dun mga cousins ko...
and chikahan for a while..
normal cousin to cousins bonding...

i realized na im getting old na...
im not bragging anything na im getting old na so kaylangan mature maturan kana...
sabi nga ni Aris sakin... im asking him...
na once i reached the age of 25 dapat im already holding on to something
na my family would be proud of me...
and im wrong w/ that... masyado akong nagmamadali...
i should enjoy my life habang young pa ko dba...
like aris said ang edad number lang un...
its your attitude that counts...

So i change all my plans to stay at my work..
and forget the Abroad issue...
nageenjoy padin naman ako w/ my friends...
specially w/ Janine...
i dont want to leave agad agad bcoz of them..
dahil sa personal plans and goals ko...
i rather stay here and reach my goals w/ them...
its to early pa para magmadali...
i want to live my life first...

plus im planning to study this yr..
my lola is convincing me all the time...
she really want me to finished my study...
yung may panghahawakan ba...
but i dont know...
di ko alam...
ayoko naman pilitin ung sarili ko na hindi bukal sa loob ko...
maybe pag i feel its time na...
but i have so many plans this 2013!..
like i want to invest into something...
yung may pupuntahan..
i want to start my own business..
like my titas are telling me...
na "almost 2 yrs. kana sa work mo, pero wala ka manlang investment"
ung totoo medyo nangliliit ako sa sarili ko...
yung cousin ko kasi opened a curtain store na sa Bataan...
Goshh.. magkaedad lang kame... and ayokong kinocompare ako
sa kanya...
hindi naman ako nakikipagkompitensya pero..
at her young age nakapag invest na sya into something...
at ako wala pa...
maybe im too much enjoying my life...
pero un ako ehhh...
im not her!..
but magiinvest ako for my own good nadin...
im glad na may mga tita ako na nanjan lang palagi...
i loved them so much..
actually more than my parents..
kasi naman 60% ng life ko sa kanila ako nagexcist...
and najan lang sila palagi kahit na ang tigas na ng ulo ko...

all the pangaral na sinabi nila sakin...
na sinunod ko.. thats why im here right now...
confident and beautiful.. Chos!..

So this 2013!..
i will live my life...
start my own business...
and stay the same...
at tigilan na ung mature maturan drama!..
kasi ako to...
and they cant change the way i am...
KAPAK!!!! :D

Cuddle pt.2

i was about to sleep na..
kaso di ako mkatulog besides him...
i dont know what will happen..
im a bit nervous...
di na ko bata.. i know what will happen if
you sleep w/ the guy you like besides you...
alam na...

so i whisper to his ears...
coz i know his not sleeping...
pinakiraramdaman nya ko.. hehe
i said..

"may sasabihin ako sayo"
...
"ano yun??"
...
"do you like me... kasi.. I like you but for now im looking forward to be your friend.."
...
he replied..
"ahmm... mas ok for now kung friends... but i like you"...
...
i was flattered seriously?!! pachicks kaya ako...
"ahhh... ok"

.......

so di na kami nakatulog...
nagusap nalang kami about mutual friends... family... personality etc..
sobrang totoo nya lang...
there's no adds on sa lahat ng kwento nya...
its just him...
most of the stories his telling was his failures and embarassment...
and most also are positives about him...
seriously walang guy na magsasabi ng mga embarassing and
failure moments nya... basta basta right...
basta ang dami namin pinagusapan....
we were enjoying talking too much...
hanggang sa nanahimik na kami....
and sabi nya nilalamig daw sya...
pero ung totoo ako naiinitan na??!!
kahit umuulan.. ang init padin...
so i dont know if gusto lang nya yakapin sya???
kaya kumuha ako ng kumot... to cover him...
kaso nilalamig padin daw sya...
so i asked him na...

"Gusto mo.. ihug kita??"
....
"Ikaw Bahala?"
...
i knew it,,, gusto lang talaga mayakap nito... haha...
(PBB TEENS)

so dumating na kami sa lambingan session at tuloy usap usap ulit...
hanggang sa pati mga buhok buhok sa katawan napagusapan nadin namin...
kasi parehas kaing balbon...
and i was telling him na tumutubo na ung chest hair ko...
and ayun meron din daw sya...
pero inaahit nya...
inangat nya yung damit nya...
hawakan ko daw ung chest nya... na inaahit nya...
at ayun ang kati!!!... kasi tumutubo na...
at pinipilit nya yung kamay ko na ihug sya...
ang kati talaga..haha...
patu bandang sa puson nya my mga tumutubo nadin...
and his holding my hands to touch does itchy hairs...
hanggang sa hinila nya pababa yung hands ko sa *toot* nya...

"ANo yun????"
....
"haha... ano pa ba??"
...
"Sabi ko ano yun.. parang wala naman??"
..
"ahh.. wala pala huh???!!! eto ka!.. HAHAHA"
...
"adik ka??!! seryoso ka...?? now? dito? sa kabilang kwarto lang sila oh?"
...
"oo dito.. now na.."
...
"adik ka!!! ang naughty mo pala! hehe"
...
"Looks can be deceiving.. haha..."

(AND THE REST WAS HISTORY)

after the Boom Boom part... actually nag end up lang sa Blow Job To Hand Job...
kasi nga mahirap na baka mahuli pa kami... si JANINE??!!!
GOsssshhhhhh i cant imagine??!!!!

i was expecting na after ng Boom Boom moments... ay uuwi na sya?
like those other guys i make Love with... na after ng Boom part...
ayun,.. uuwi na sila.. :((
but this one is different... he stayed at my side...
and sleep... we sleep together hugging w/ each other and holding each other hands... ♥
it was different... and i hope this is really different...

It was aroung 4:00am nung ginsing nya ko..
uuwi na daw sya... kasi my pasok pa sya....
and thats it... hinatid ko sya sa labas hanggang makasakay sya
ng trycle... and my night was AMAZING!!...
it was Great!... hehe ♥

Colleagues

last saturday, aug.18,2012...

was my colleagues mates birthday..

and grabe after many months...

lang ulit kami nagbonding w/ my

engineering classmates...

it was so fun...

full of happines... sobrang namiss ko talaga cla...

its around 6pm ng narecieve ko ung messge nila from

fcebook...

and yun agad agd ako pumunta sa lagoon..

for shot...

naka 3 kaming Antonov and 3 GSM Blue...

i ws really drunk... but the moments and happiness

that night.. hinding hindi ko makakalimutan..

I really miss them and yun sila 1 semester

nalang graduate na... Engineers!!...

im so proud of them...

ang hirap ng engineering noh!..

SUICIDAL!!!

so sobrang stream naman ako sa facebook

to check our pictures.. during college days...

hay sobrang kamiss lang,,

but im happy kung saan at istado ko ngayun,,,

coz im happy and contented..

Friends

"Masarap maging SINGLE,
masaya maging TAKEN,

pero alam yung the best?
yung tipong SWEETFRIEND lang..

...
But you get the feeling of being TAKEN and the freedom of being SINGLE"

..................................

based on my last post...

http://bakitchan.blogspot.com/2012/08/badtrip.html

im too rude saying bad words with doreimon...

masyado lang talaga akong warfreak...

even na alam kong di ko gusto yung sinasabi ko....

yung i know na ayaw ko naman talaga na ganun yung mangyari...

i dont really want to destroy our friendship...

i dont wanna loose and forget all the moments we had...

i dont wanna loose him as my friend...

his not a Looser and his not a Feeler...

i dont even know bat ko sinulat yun...

its not me... its my anger...

di ko dapat sinulat yun...

kasi alam ko naman his not like that...

his the best guy i ever met...

masyado lang ako nagpadala sa emotion ko..

na i hindi ko na nacontrol and burst out on my mind...

at sinalo nalang ng article... hehe...

so last night...

we celebrate Aries birthday for half an hour ata. haha...

its a simple celebration...

konting spaghetti and chicken donated by Janine..

were so broke na wala na talaga kaming panghanda!

it was fun though... money is not a big deal

if the celebration is Fun and unforgetable.. haha..

after the short time celebration...

nanood na kami ni janine.. ng LOST.. season 1..

at yun nalost ako at nakatulog..

i left janine.. watching the whole night...

nagising ako mga around 11:30am na ata,.,,

pero wla na si janine.. and he left his laptop beside my bed...

at ayun umuwi na pala si gaga.. but his coming back later...

to celebrate Aries birthday again..haha

...................

i log in to my facebook..

and yun.. nagmessage si doreimon...

too end this story short....

nagsorry ako with him..

being rude...

being bitter..

the pangbabara ko sa kanya,...

to all the bad things na sinasabi ko sa kanya....

for being warfreak...

and i explain to him.. na...

kaya naman ako nagkakaganto kasi

im hating myself dahil lahat lahat naman to..

ako my kasalanan...

from the first place kung di ko naman talaga binigyan

ng meaning lahat,.. diba?

ayoko talaga siraan lahat...

so i guess tama na yung pagiging rude...

and get back on shape ulit...

Fail!

Hey..its August!!!!
a fresh start for a change...
pero yung totoo first day of august..
late ako ng 1 hour sa work!!!???
thats what you call "CHANGE"!!??!!


anyway back to my first day of august,..
i feel bad kasi i seen my friend at work...
nagtetake sya ng exam for content writer which is
hiring sa work ko...
na envy lang ako kasi naman, shes looking for a job
na gusto nya talagang gawin..
compare to me im stuck on that company...
type type everyday... How BORING!!!!!!
if you compare it with my life in college...
sobrang dami kong dreams...
ang dami kong gusto gawin sa life ko after college..
pero eto.. nastuck ako sa computer type ng type magdamag...

Im a talented person.. madami akong skills...
im an artist.. a writer... a photographer.. im smart enough and. im a creative person...
i deserve a better job!!!...
now im upset... this is not what i want...
i want something extraordinary!!!
yung hilig ko talaga?
alam mo yun... yung masaya kang ginagawa mo...
dapat ang trabaho ineenjoy...
and i want a job like that...
i want to enhance my skills..
ayoko mawala sila while im still young...
i need to move forward!!!!
and im confident na kaya ko to...

Inspire

Ok.. finally i made a choice na...
im ready na to give up my current job...
stress nadin kasi ako dun plus im looking forward na
i fulltime na yung odesk as a web researcher and data encoder..
im just waiting to get hired for full time position like 40-60 hours/week..
plus dollar rate dun.. and nasa bahay kalang..
and weekly ang sahuran.. no taxe's and deduction..
ung deduction ko dun ung sa bank transfer lang na cost around 99.00 pesos.. hehe
so yun... kaya almost a week nadin akong absent sa work ko..
dahil nadin nga nasstress ako dun sa isang tao pag nakikita ko..
haha... pero wala naman na sakin yun... FINALLY!!!
nagetover nadin ako... but stress padin pag naririnig ko boses nya
or yung maaninag ko lang sya..
ewan ko ba dun... naging BITTER SWEET talaga yung ending..
atleast my mapagmamalaki na sya dba.. na mya nalaglag sa kanya...
Beki nga lang.. haha.. FEELER SYA HA!!!!
so for now.. Erase Erase Erase.. and focus for a better future and opportunity!!!

SOBRANG HAPPY NA KO...
overwhelmed and inspired for my future na.. hehe..

and last night lumabas kami ni new friend yung sa FB..
naghangout lang kami.. were closed friends na...
after i lost the other one my pumalit naman agad dba...
haha.. blessed padin ako after all..